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What Is Money Avoidance?
Let’s face it—talking about money isn’t exactly most people’s idea of a good time. Especially when many have felt increasing financial pressure over the past few years. If you wince at the thought of managing your money situation, you’re not alone.
Most people don’t consider paying their bills, budgeting, or generally keeping track of their personal finances as fun activities. For some, it can become so uncomfortable or overwhelming that they avoid thinking about their finances altogether.
No matter how much money you have in your bank account, it can be tempting to sweep your financial concerns under the rug. Money avoidance happens when you ignore your finances at all costs, even when it’s doing you a disservice.
This can show up in many ways, such as:
- Procrastination
- Leaving bills unopened
- Ignoring spending patterns
- Not viewing bank accounts
- Avoiding difficult financial conversations
Human brains are wired towards seeking rewards and avoiding threats. Evolutionarily, this can be understood through the lens of early humans, who were focused on securing food and escaping predators.
These days, our “fight or flight” response can kick into gear when we’re checking our monthly utility bill, talking about a recent impulse purchase, or making a plan to pay off a loan.
Financial concerns are often steeped in deeply uncomfortable feelings of shame and fear. And the urge to avoid these feelings makes complete sense. The problem is, research shows that when we try to avoid an emotion, we tend to create more of it, which ultimately gives it more power. What’s more, the emotion now has free rein to emerge in hidden ways—such as overindulging in “retail therapy”—that tend to pose more problems for ourselves.
Avoiding our finances to avoid psychological discomfort also keeps us stuck in the same unhelpful patterns that have contributed to our financial problems in the first place.
Fortunately, it’s possible to shift away from money avoidance and learn to turn towards and resolve your financial challenges. Below are five steps that can help you get there:
- Make space to reflect on your financial habits
- Connect with the present moment
- Move towards what matters to you
- Take small steps
- Be patient with yourself
Change is hard, and self-compassion is essential to building a healthy relationship with your finances. We all face roadblocks and have slip-ups. The steps above can give you the tools to build the financial life that you’re aiming for.
For more information on money avoidance, read here.
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